Traditional TV purveyors fail to rise to big moment - Albany Times Union

Let's face it: American television has blown its big chance.

Thanks to the coronavirus pandemic, a lot of us are spending plenty of time around the house. Sure, we're working from home, schooling from home, cleaning the home, cooking at home, doing just about everything at home. But there are times when those activities are just too much, times when we'd like to just take a few minutes to escape into the world of the Big Eye: That is, just watch a little television. C'mon; we all do it. Just take a few minutes to escape into the wonderful world of TV. And we're talking MILLIONS of eyes.

But it's not as easy as it sounds.

For a little context, I've been doing the TV criticism thing for quite a while. I started out back in the '70s, the TV critic who griped mightily about the truly substandard comedies and dramas of the time. But that was a different world. Back then, there were three networks and PBS (which pretty much did its own thing, as it pretty much does now). Now, there are a gazillion more choices, from cable to streaming to who-knows-what-else. But have things really improved?

Now, let's be clear here. I'm not talking about Netflix, Amazon, Apple TV-Plus, Disney-Plus, Hulu and the like. From all I see, they're all doing what they're supposed to do: Offer imaginative alternatives for viewing. But let's be honest: With cable-internet bills soaring into the hundreds of dollars, not all of us can afford all the streaming services. Especially since many households are in financial distress, thanks to the virus and all the levels of quarantine, job loss, difficulties with unemployment benefits and uncertainty. So that leaves us with cable TV, with all its hundreds of channels, from the networks to specialty stations to premium channels. And what is happening there?

Nothing.

It's as if the American television conglomerate decided, "We'll do exactly what we've always done and not take advantage of the millions of viewers being thrown our way." By treating this spring and summer as the usual rerun season, they're missing their opportunity.

Let's start at prime time. I've long since given up on the networks. Take a close look at the weekly schedule, and you'll note a huge chunk of that time is given over to what I'll call for argument's sake "police procedurals." Now, they're not all set in the police station. Some take place in hospitals, military courts, firehouses, even battlefields of various sorts. And they're located all over the place, a bunch of them in Chicago. But they're all the same show, usually starring one movie star-looking white male with some appropriately colorful cohorts, and they have the same plot: crisis-investigation-complications-resolution. If you've seen one, you've seen them all, in one neat hour package (unless it's one of a two-parter or a crossover).

Otherwise, the networks have a bunch of stupid game shows (more violent, louder and even dumber in summer), some lurid newsmagazines, music-dance-whatever competitions, a few geriatric sitcoms (new ones? "Broke"? Puh-leeese.). Fox veers off into superheroes and cartoons, for what that's worth. So, nothing much here. Is it any wonder these guys don't win many Emmys anymore?

The great "innovation" of the quarantine, the CBS "Sunday Night Movie" (why does that sound familiar?) is anything but. The movies they've featured are achingly familiar: "Titanic," "Forrest Gump," "Mission: Impossible," "Indiana Jones and the Incredible Repeating Plot Twists." Anyone who has cable knows you could have seen any of those multiple times in the last few months.

The specialized cable channels don't do much better. It's summer, and most of them have decided to pretty much play dead, with endless reruns and replays, from zombies to vampires to 660-pound folks to wedding dresses to "mysteries" occult and historic. The movies don't help, either. I swear I could have seen every iteration of the "Fast & Furious" franchise several times over. And the "Twilight" and "Hunger Games" sagas, and just about any superhero retread, "Harry Potter," the endless "Smokey & the Bandit" ad nauseum, not to mention the "Star Wars" and "Star Treks" over and over. Business as usual.

So, let's talk about daytime, and this is where things get really bad. The networks and their substations have some geriatric game shows, a few very creaky soap operas, some courtroom "judgies" (injured pets, security deposits or straying hubbies, anyone?).

And there is talk – talk, talk, talk, talk. There are the single talkers, the double talkers, and even multiple talkers, with sometimes as many as five semi-celebrities spouting off about whatever they think is the topic of the day. This is nothing new, but to make matters worse, they're mostly coming "from home" now, as if to say "Hey, looky, we're just like you, stuck in the basement." Well, I have news for them: They could be doing their shows from their old studios, with minimal technical staff, social distancing and no audiences. And they wouldn't seem as if they're photographed and recorded by Aunt Tillie on her smartphone. So that doesn't cut it. (And that goes for the boys of late night, too.) Talk is cheap.

Even in these days of supposed binge-watching, does anyone really want to spend the afternoon watching 12 episodes of "Diners Drive-Ins and Dives" in a row on the Food Channel? How about seven consecutive hours of "Chopped"? How about a staggering 15 half-hour episodes of "South Park" on the Comedy Channel? How about 10 of "The Office"? Oh, National Geographic, why a full afternoon of "Alaska State Troopers" or "Life Below Zero"? It goes on and on: "Ghost Adventures" on Travel. "Gunsmoke" and "Andy Griffith" and "Golden Girls" on TVLand. "Impractical Jokers" on TruTV. HGTV flogs us to death with "Property Brothers" and "Good Bones." And what is the deal with the supposedly prestigious Smithsonian Channel and airline crashes?

This is just plain laziness or stupidity, or both. At some point, the execs at these cable channels decided, "Oh, it's daytime and no one's watching, so why bother?" Well, today, a lot of us are watching, and we're not liking what we're seeing.

Which brings us to what cable could be doing. For one thing, I know the catalogs of these channels have a lot more depth than we're seeing. Some of that rerun space could be filled with more challenging shows from the past, to change it up. Is there really nothing out there that could replace "Gunsmoke," which seems to air at least 10 times a day on various channels? Could the Food Channel be resurrecting some old favorites like "Barefoot Contessa" or even Sandra Lee's shows? How about some comedians doing standup specials on the Comedy Channel?

Now that new production is kicking in, can we get some imagination? Or how about some little-seen movies from the 2000s and 2010s? Or even some from the '80s and '90s that haven't been shown to death.

And speaking of the streaming and premium services: How about getting them to loosen up some of their considerable product for cable distribution? Years ago, "Sex and the City" had a great run on cable after HBO finished its run (in fact, it's still around on various channels and streaming services). So did "The Sopranos." How about spending some money and letting a general audience see some of the goodies? This might be a good time to see some "Veep" on non-premium cable. And, when Disney-Plus finally tires of "Hamilton" exclusivity, how about that for a real "Sunday Night Movie?"

But mainly, networks and cable: Mix it up, get out of that rut. Try something, and if it doesn't work, try something else.

Now that some of us, very slowly, are getting back into the New Normalcy, it probably means a lot of those extra eyes will be going away, back to the office, back to school, back to whatever it will be. And if things continue the way they have been, guess what we'll be watching?

Nothing.

James R. Gray is a retired Times Union editor.

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Traditional TV purveyors fail to rise to big moment - Albany Times Union
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